When you are busy parents or have busy careers (or both!) sometimes alone time with your significant other almost always gets set on the back burner. It’s so easy…or, maybe just becomes scheduled habit, to go through life just trying to get through the day. A comfortable routine sets in where you just need to get through the work day only to get home and, right away, need to get supper on the table, then kids bathed and off to bed. And by the time you’ve done all that, you’re exhausted. Forget any cleaning that needs to be done, let alone extra projects! When the weekends come around you just want to relax, or maybe there is a mountain of house work to be done or, if you are like Joe and I, your career life spills into the weekends. I know, you’ve heard it all before…moms/parents are busy.
But maybe this isn’t you? Well, at least not yet anyways. But if you plan to have a family or take on any extra curricular activities outside of your job then this could be you. A life where finding time with your better half is like some extinct dating ritual that’s only reserved for teenagers.
In my opinion, it’s this alone time that should be considered a higher priority. After all, we are stuck with each other even after the kids move out. Ha! It’s important to continue to build and strengthen that relationship even as the years go on so we don’t forget who one another is, what each other’s ever-changing goals and passions are, what each other’s thoughts and dreams consist of or, why we fell in love together in the first place. Commitment is key and should always be #1 in our relationship.
Joe and I were fortunate to have several years together before kids came along but we quickly filled up our extra time with career things and building our own house. After Liella came along we rarely spent time together. Maybe we left the house a couple of times without her but it was always with friends, never just the two of us. Shortly after she turned one we went on a cruise and left Liella for 10 days!! Of course we missed her dearly but right away I had a little “ah ha” moment. This is what it was like before kids! This connection to each other, the conversation, the laughs, the focus on just him and I. I had nearly forgotten what it was like! It was so fun and so necessary. From that moment on we vowed that we would try to work in more time together, just the two of us. Whether it’s a monthly date night, grocery shopping without kids, movie night after the kids are in bed or even a weekend away every few months. And since then we have really made a huge change towards that goal. But I won’t lie though…it’s not easy! There are many times, seasons in our lives, where we have fallen into our busy trap again and some time has passed since we’ve spent quality time together. We are either busy working, or our children’s necessities are priority, or maybe our budget just doesn’t allow for us to get together. But that’s when we get creative and we carve the time out. We make it happen. Because we know it’s important to both of us to keep our relationship strong.
This last weekend was Max Yield’s employee appreciation weekend in Des Moines and we were scheduled to attend. Alone time that we were eagerly awaiting. Just as we were about to head down the road Joe realized that our heat wasn’t working correctly in our shop and needed to fix it before our waterlines in the floor would freeze. He spent 4.5 hours trying to fix it with no luck. We contemplated staying home to get it fixed but we were packed up already and we knew this time was important. So Joe rigged up some electric heaters to get us by for the night and then headed out. Our time was cut short and we rearranged our plans a bit but we still made time for us and that is what was important. Our shop floor was just fine for a day and on our way home we picked up some supplies and Joe had it fixed in no time the next day. Ideally I would have LOVED to have spent more time like we had planned BUT I’m thankful we did spend some time together, just him and I. 😉
Here are some images from our short trip. 🙂